This is what happened the first and only time I went to Pitchfork Music Festival.

I don’t like music outside or crowds or summer. I never have. There are usually a couple bands I’m interested in, but not enough to wait through ten I don’t care about while roasting in July misery in a sea of people I don’t know but dislike on principle.

So why am I subjecting myself to it again? A couple reasons. One is that the way I lost my cool seven years ago has been eating at me this whole time. I don’t like that I couldn’t suck it up and take it. The stakes were so low. Maybe that made it easier to flake out and disappoint people who’d been generous and invited me to take part in their thing. Those people won’t be there this time, but maybe if I make it through, it’ll right the karmic imbalance a little. Two is that I have a lot of crap I’d like to get rid of. Books, art, etc. It’s sitting here gathering dust. Because I have no publisher, label, agent, manager, not even an unpaid intern, it’s on me to move this crap out.

I did Renegade Craft Fair once before. It was inside at the Bridgeport Art Center, just up the street from my place. I made a bunch of money and even scored some future commissions but it was sort of overwhelming. I was glad to have the table between myself and the endless slow-moving throng of humanity. After two days I was completely spent. I told myself I wouldn’t do it again. Thought there must be some better way to make money.

In the years since, I’ve found a few new rackets, but the art and books keep piling up, so I’m returning to the fair to hock my wares. I can’t pitch a fit and stomp out this time because I paid for a spot and don’t like repeating myself. Who knows if I’ll enjoy it at all; I’m just gonna try to survive. Hopefully I can hear Spiritualized and Low and Dry Cleaning from where I sit. Jeff Parker too. Good chance I’ll see a lot of people I know. Several friends have worked Pitchfork for years. Trying to be upbeat which doesn’t come natural. If it goes bad, at least I’m secure in the knowledge I did it to myself. No one asked me to be there so there’s no one else to blame.

Friday through Sunday, I have a table at the Renegade Craft Pop-Up. I’ll bring books, prints, bookmarks, maybe a few drawings and collages. I’ll offer to draw pets of most species. Even human.

Perhaps I’ll even see you there.

—Been listening to Daniel Villarreal’s Panamá 77 a lot. Loved his set at Thalia too.

—Wrote about Olivier Assayas’ cool new Irma Vep series and Lucy Sante’s book on how NYC got drinking water.

—Due to popular demand, my show at Rainbo will run through July 30th, so you can go back and see it for a third or fourth time, and maybe consider choosing a piece to decorate your home or office.

—I read some stuff by Denis Johnson into a microphone. Wednesday I talk to music writer Leor Galil. In the meantime, listen to the one with Marc Fischer or some others. Also, I finally found a horror movie Mallory doesn’t like!